Loneliness

Loneliness creeps up on me. Just when I think I'm happy. I have a female friend that would slap me stupid for saying that. But lets be honest, when your single sometimes life can get you down and as much as I'm all for being independant and not relying on a man, it would be nice to have someone. Funnily enough this female friend who always says things like "I'm really worried about how you feel like you need a man" is the same friend who constantly lets me down. Maybe if I had female friends I could depend on ...then no, I wouldn't need a man. I still arue that YES I do NOT need a man. I don't feel that I need a man, I can survive on my own. But there are those times when something happens in your life and you wish you had someone a little closer to you than a friend.

I once read somewhere that having a partner meant that you have a witness to your life. The article was about marriage it could be applied to any relationship. Maybe my long to find someone comes from my need to share my thoughts and events in my life. With friends you tell one friend a story and then you tell another friend another story, together they know 2 parts of your life but each friend still does not know everything. Maybe that goes with the decision of what you share with your friends. I personally find that I talk to different friends about different things. With a partner you tell them almost everything because you make an effort at communication whereas a friend may dwindle away for a few days or weeks or months or years.