I want to do it all!

There are so many things in life I want to do. I want to be rich (not sure about famous. Just like most people. But it's also something I would give up in a heartbeat for true happiness, ie if there was a guy who could guarantee me financial security and a guy that i was crazy about the second would win every time.

I know I'm not going to get there by sitting on my ass, but I just don't know what I want to do yet. I think I'm going to enrol in a course in business management. That might be a start, study never hurts, you only have everything to gain from learning new things and knowing more about the world and how it works.

Work

I've been working. It's been ok. I'm just glad I'm going to have some money. I've almost got enough to pay my parents the full amount I owe them for the car (which I'm really looking forward to so they can't using owing them against me).

I've been working on my driving, drove more in the last week than I have the whole year!

Things have been ok. Not good but not bad, I'm doing what I wanted, getting my life on track...getting the wheels in motion but it jsut doesnt feel like it. This was supposed to make me happy. I have a job I'm earning money, I have a car and I'm working on getting a licence, I have alot to be thankful for and yet at night when I go to bed I'm still kept awake by my nagging thoughts stressing too much about things like boys. What stupid stupid things they are. I don't know why I even bother, it always ends the same way, me crying in the dark thinking what ass's they were. Why can't I just be happy to be me, be alone, be free. Oh why.

Starting New Job and another job offer!

Wow, I've gone from having nothing to having 3 jobs on the table in a matter of a couple of months. I have the clerical job now confirmed to be starting on Monday (sooo happy about that) then in May I have the nannying job starting. Ontop of all of this I got a phone call about another clerical job which is mine if I want it. Its a much more serious job than the others, in the respect that on a resume it would look more impressive.

The job would be doing clerical work in a doctors office in a private practise joint to the hospital. If I take this job I want to volunteer in the kids room at the hospital. Doing the volunteer work would give me a good reference for working with children, experience and an impressive background if I apply for a job in a child care centre. But of course importantly it will give me something to do where I am helping the community and giving something back to the world. At the same time the actual job itself is apparently well paid and as I said, impressive to put on a resume.

Problem is, the original clerical job it meant to be Mondays and Tuesday, the Nannying job Thursdays and Fridays. The new clerical job is also supposed to be Mondays and tuesdays.

I don't know what I want to do because on one hand the origanl clerical work was focusing on website databiasing and photography with some clerical, whereas the the new one is full on clerical side, filing paperwork etc. So do I go for the money and the security or the job that I'd prefer doing more?

I think thats a question people ask themselves for most of their lives.